Ada's Poorly

Ohh I love a good jumble don’t you?

Well I prefer the church jumble really , better stuff as a rule. Nah on my own today Ada’s not so good at the moment.

Yeah heard about it then? Nah… I’m not going to let that mugging business get me down, keep soldiering on that’s me! What did you get then?

Ohh...Very nice...real quality that ….M and S ehh? You did well didn’t you? Me? Ohh I got a lovely vase. My Frank sometimes brings me flowers, you know
Mother’s day and the like, be nice to have something decent to put them in.
What else you get then? Oh yes nice curtains they are..where you going to put them? Sure their in one of these bags. Very nice, go well in there. Bit dusty love..chest not so good at the mo. Still.. quick spin round your twintub and they will be good as new. Got a beautiful dressing gown look at this...that will keep the chill off won’t it? Yeah that what Frank says but doesn’t seem worth it just for me…I just keep putt more on. Wots vat love? Oh yeah ‘course I get my fuel payment…use that to pay for Christmas don’t I? Talking of Christmas got a lovely cardigan in there, I’m going to where it at Frank and Gloria’s this Christmas.

Nah I seem to get on with Glo a lot better these days..must be going soft in my old age!You off to your daughter’s again this Christmas? Ohh that will be nice.What’s her name again? Susan …how many times you told me that eh? Still you have a nice time won’t you. Will you stay for new year too? A nice break that. Listen here’s my Frank now….do you want a lift? Course he won’t mind! Heart of gold my Frank has, heart of gold!

Effels Mugging Ordeal

Ohh yes it was awful…Tell you what get the drinks in and I’ll make myself comfy and tell you all about it. I’ll be in my usual seat in the corner. My usual fanks very kind of you I’m sure…nah wait up I’ll have a brandy on account of my nerves, in shreds they are, shreds.
Ohhh luverly just wait the doctor ordered, this’ll do the trick nicely. Your ‘ealth! A double too, very kind indeed.
Hear about it did you? Yeah… nasty business all round. Wotsvat? Nah on my way ome from the bingo when it happened, nah can’t afford a taxi can I? Just left Ada at hers turned the corner and wham! Didn’t know what hit me did I?
Yeah that’s what my Frank said but I can’t stop in every night can I? Go orf my chump wouldn’t I?
My Frank’s youngest suggested self defence classes, you know feng shu and the like…but I didn’t need it did I? Not me ! I hit him with me handbag and with my brolly too for good measure yeah good and proper. Lor you should have seen him run! That Linford Christie would have been proud!
Ada’s taken it badly you know, it’s really upset her somehow. No couldn’t persuade her to come ‘ere tonight, that’s why I’m on my own.
Ohh seen it in the paper did you…yes headline news "OAP’s mugging ordeal” Makes me out to be some sort of hero…ridiculous in my opinion…still feel a bit shaken up mind and it’s been a week since! Ohhh don’t mind if I do very kind same again ta.

Hello There

Hello there
I'm Effel. My grandson has said he will do one of them computer diary thingies for me. You see after my muggin ordeal I've become somewhat of a local celebrity and the radio chappie thought my uniquely refreshing perspective or somfink would make a good show. But I had to go in for my hip to be done and he's not interested anymore so I thought I'd get our Martin to do this on his PC wotzit thing.
Still please visit and read the things what I'm gettin up to.
And if that Bert 'Arris is reading......that's not what I mean so stop that milarky right now.
Eff